Mandie Green

Freelance Writer, Santa Monica, CA

She is a spy in their midst. East-Coast raised Mandie has worked in the entertainment industry for over 12 years, including feature films, sitcoms, documentaries, and episodic cable shows. Her romantic comedy The Michaels has placed in several screenplay contests, and is in negotiations over a finance/distribution offer from an Australian production company. She resides in Santa Monica, CA, with her husband Josh and has chosen to offer guys some of her wisdom from the other side of the (gender and socio-geographical) universe.

BBG: What things or people inspire your personal style?
MG: I am inspired by people who enjoy their lives, whether they wear Gucci or Old Navy (unless they smell or have bad breath, then the former really doesn't apply). If you're happy, clothes seem to look better on you. If you’re funny, no one cares. If you're fit, you most likely look good in everything anyway. Don’t get me wrong, as a female I love playing dress up, and fashion is FUNtastic. I just hate the periodic obsession that women have with it, including myself. I just remembered I have to go to the mall.

BBG: Is how you look important to you? Why?
MG: Well, let's see, I just whitened my teeth, made an appointment to get my highlights redone and I'm due for a mani/pedi. Of course, we all like to look good, but I'm not going to stay home from a party because I have a zit, especially if they're serving free food. If I can't fit into my skinny jeans, (which is my current situation), I just put my best buttock forward or um, backward. You know what I mean.

BBG: What sort of behavior do you see too much of and what would say to young men about it?
MG: I see a basic lacking in dating etiquette, which I feel leaves both parties feeling disrespected. It's hard to know who is supposed to pick up the check or make the first move. It would be great to see younger men go back to the fundamentals when it comes to dating, so they can see women as people instead armfuls of girl or as sexual depositories. There's so much focus on sexual prowess and not enough on the important stuff like how much money she makes or if she can cook or sew.

BBG: What unique tip(s) can you give a guy coming up that could make him a Better Guy?
MG: Well, let's see

• Don’t play games, if you're interested in someone act like it.
• Don't lie (except in cases when she asks you if she looks fat in something, then you should always fib accordingly).
• Don't keep exes around to exercise your right to have any friends you want. If it bothers your new chick (who we will assume you care about), take your ex's picture off the 'fridge and let the friendship go until your new squeeze becomes more secure with your relationship. Besides, if the ex was so great, why did you dump her in the first place?
• Don't look at other women while in the presence of your current date-- I don’t care how outstanding the boobs are, swivel heading sends a clear message that you're still looking, literally.
• Don’t ask meaningless questions about a woman's past relationships (unless of course you think she's still married). Assuming she has not done any time in the big house and isn't suffering from a serious mental illness, her past relationships shouldn't have any bearing on the present. Besides, her response will always make her look good, (if you only knew what he was saying about her).
• Don’t ask a female how many people she has slept with. If it's more than you, you will possibly judge her and get all weird and emasculated about it. If it's less than you, you will probably still judge her and get all weird and emasculated about it.
• Don't ask women what they're looking for in a man. If she really knew she would have found already. Besides what we think we want and what will ultimately make us happy are usually two different things.
  
• Last, but not least on Valentine's Day never give a date a cuddly bear holding a fuzzy red heart. Nothing says you couldn't care less beyond just plain not showing up at all.

BBG: What makes a guy stand out?
MG: Is he naked or dressed? Confidence, someone who likes to have fun, and most importantly, a guy who is willing to make an idiot out of himself if it will simply make you (playing the part of the female) laugh. In my happily married, humble opinion, you stand out by being someone who wants another person, but doesn't need another person. It's the needy aspect which is draining and unhealthy in any type of relationship. Your spouse/partner/girlfriend is not your parent, caretaker, or therapist. Successful relationships are not about two people who cannot live without one another, they are about two people that can. They just choose to be together not as two halves making a whole, but as two wholes making one big alien shaped amoeba (okay, I'm kidding on the amoeba). That whole Jerry Maguire "You complete me," thing has gotten everyone very confused. What Tom Cruise's character should have said was, "You complement me," meaning her attributes, values, and goals, instead of another person filling in some puzzle-piece void.

BBG: What was the best single experience you've had with your husband?
MG: We had been dating for about 6 months, and my birthday was on the following Friday. He told me to be at his apartment that day at 8 A.M. and to dress comfortably. I thought maybe he was sending me off for a spa day. I racked my brain trying to figure out where I could possibly be going by myself. The morning came, and I said, "Well, where am I going?!" and he replies, "I took the day off of work, and we're going to Disneyland!" I was elated, and we had a great time. Honestly, if I had known all along it wouldn't have been as much fun.

Gentlemen, always add the element of surprise to any occasion big or small because chicks dig it. Besides bringing out the kid in all of us, surprises take planning, and it shows you care enough about your date to do something special.

BBG: If you could have a conversation with one person, who would it be?
MG: Oprah, because I want her bank account number and her password. If I couldn’t talk to Oprah, then I would want to talk to God because I bet he knows her bank account number and password. If I couldn't talk to either of them, then I would pick my husband. He is one of the only people in the world who accepts me exactly as I am, and he thinks my flaws and idiosyncrasies are funny. God probably knows why my husband thinks that, but I don’t think Oprah does.

BBG: What do you do/where do you go for fun?
MG: Outside usually. Somewhere near restaurants and places of entertainment where they serve liquor and food. Places where I can talk to friends, meet new people, and realize that my husband and I spend way too much time together.

BBG: Who’s more attractive, Scarlett Johansson or Thandie Newton? Why?
MG: Personally, I have a girl crush (not lesbian crush, I said girl crush) on Scarlett Johansson. She's oddly beautiful and interesting to watch. She also has a butt on her and she doesn't seem very interested in starving herself or barfing up her food, which I think is really cool of her.