The day’s perfect. Everyone’s excited about the wedding. The bride is beautiful in her gown, the groom’s handsome in his tuxedo, and you’re . . . in the background. That’s because it’s not your day. No one’s paying attention to what you’re wearing and that’s the way it’s supposed to be. It’s not the time to stake your claim as the best-dressed guy in the room – that’s the groom’s role.

So, what does a guy wear to a wedding? Be Better Guys has these suggestions.  First, dress for the occasion, which means reading the invitation and following the dress code indicated (semi-formal, formal, cocktail attire). If they ask you to wear a Hawaiian shirt for their beach-themed nuptials, then do your best Magnum, PI impersonation and get to it. Second, dress for the season. No heavy wool in June, no linen in October.  Third, dress for the environment. Are you on a beach or in a historic house in the bride’s hometown? All of these things play a role in the choices you make.

If the invitation doesn’t say, assume semi-formal, which means a suit, specifically a dark suit if the wedding’s after 6 pm. For an afternoon wedding, lighter colors like pale grey, beige, even olive will work fine.  Don’t be afraid to wear a suit with a pattern, like a chalk stripe or a subtle check.  It’s a celebration, so dress the part. However, this is not the time to embrace your inner Huggy Bear and wreck the wedding photos with a maroon plaid suit. Take a low-key approach to the shirt and tie combo with a solid shirt and a patterned tie – this is where you can add some color. We recommend wearing French cuffs and cuff links, and definitely wear a pocket square that complements the tie or suit for a bit of personal style. You don’t want to be anonymous, but you don’t want to upstage the wedding party. Again, it’s not your day.

If the invite calls for formal, pull out the tuxedo or call the local rental shop. Day-time weddings call for a morning coat (a grey cut-away jacket with tails, waistcoat, striped ascot), but not many people this side of the Atlantic wear this. Even though black is not appropriate for a day wedding if asked, just wear a tux. Truthfully, if you wear a tuxedo at least once a year, it’s worth buying one. They don’t go out of style and you can get one for the price of a moderately priced suit. Traditionally, you wear it with a black bow tie, a straight collared dress shirt, and either a cummerbund or waistcoat, but lately black neck ties have been the rage. If you’re going Hollywood, just make sure the necktie’s solid black and that it has a bit of sheen to it.

You’ll look good and be appropriately dressed. You can “wow” them on the dance floor, if you need to flex a bit.