There are hundreds of fragrances available and it can easily confuse the crap out of you, from drugstore cheapies like Drakkar Noir to pricey boutique scents like Tom Ford, so before we evaluate some of the top ones, you may want to spend a moment in repose thinking, What kind of guy am I?  Or rather, What kind of image do I want to project?

Narrowing down your search by knowing what image you’re trying to project keeps you from wasting time with the hyper-macho John Varvatos Vintage when you’re really a kick-back, relaxed kind of guy, or blowing your budget on the clean, crisp-smelling Sean John Unforgivable when you’re trying to convey a rugged, studly vibe. 

So, to evaluate the best of the latest hot colognes for guys, I did threee things – wore samples myself and asked my wife, asked attractive women at work and the gym for their opinion, and I consulted the guys’ cologne expert, Yomery, at the Sephora fragrance emporium in Georgetown, one of the largest-selling men’s fragrance sections in the nation. You’ll get my comments and you’ll get Yomery’s, and I’ve ranked these from most favorite to least.

David: “I felt like a different guy with this stuff on, and my wife looked at me like she wanted to get a babysitter and a can of whipped cream. Why, we haven’t done that in weeks!”

Yomery: “Hanae Mori has become one of our most popular fragrances because it is so exotic, so unique. It’s a parfum, meaning it’s really intense, is very low alcohol, and you don’t need more than one squirt to cover you for the evening.  It’s floral and oriental at the same time and is a combination of twenty botanicals. It’s expensive for the size, but you need so little that it lasts as long as twice the eau de toilettes you get anywhere else. Women love it on you and on themselves so you may have to fight her for who puts it on first.”

David: “Been wearing this for years now, particularly when I go out at night, even though it makes for a great daytime fragrance. It’s clean, fresh, and a few women who were not my wife even commented that I smelled ‘kissable.’ Now that’s dangerous juice.”

Yomery: “This is hands-down our most popular fragrance, it’s our number-one seller. It smells like water, if you could wear water as a fragrance. It’s clean and citrusy and has been the same for years and years. It just works.”

David:  “You know, I’m not a Gucci guy – the shoes, the belt buckles, the $4,000 motorcycle jackets. And I was prepared to not like their cologne either, but they surprised me. I was catching whiffs of myself all day and wondering, ‘Who is that smelling so good?  Me? Oh.  Hot!’  My wife thought it made smelled ‘exotic.’  I haven’t been called exotic since I was the only Jew on my freshman dorm floor.”

Yomery: “Gucci II is very masculine with a combination of oriental notes accented with a woody, pine scent and herbs. The guy who buys this has money. You can smell it.”

David: “Hot.”

David: “I did not feel immediately British or desiring to wear plaid, as the Burberry brand has been getting men to do for decades. I did get a few positive comments from women in the office, such as, ‘David, you smell nice’ and ‘You smell like you’re a fan of the English Beat,’ so I’ve got that goin’ for me.”

Yomery: “Burberry has been blending the fresh, citrusy, almost water-like scents with exotic herbs both in this fragrance and in the Burberry Touch (also $67, 3.3 oz) line. I, for one, don’t find it sexy. But I do find it masculine and pleasant smelling. I’d prefer to smell a guy wearing this during the day and opt for something more intriguing for the evening.”

David: “It was a pleasant fragrance and 3 women thought I smelled like a Man of Power. If only they knew the truth. At least it’s better than smelling like a Man of Powder.”

Yomery: “Marc Jacobs is a great fragrance for the weekend. It’s got a perfumy tone to it with a citrus/wood mix of scents, but also has the oriental/jasmine element that adds intrigue. “

David:  “Something weird happened – I sprayed this on, got in the car and within five minutes of driving around, I thought I smelled the vague odor of dog poop. So I checked my shoes. Nothing. Hands? Clean. Lacoste doesn’t smell like dog doo out of the bottle, but remember, fellas, it’s all about body chemistry and this one didn’t pass.”

Yomery: “Lacoste is very popular these days because it’s a subtle scent that has a real elegance. A very masculine fragrance that goes great at the office.”

David: “I’d like to think I’m manly enough without the fuel-injected kickintheass that Varvatos Vintage provides. It’s very woodsy and leathery so if you need more woods and leather in your life, a spritz of this will cure your ails. My wife said it reminded her of the English Leather that her dad used to wear. She’d prefer I not smell like her dad.”

Yomery: “Vintage is all wood, all pine, all leather and cigars. It’s hyper-masculine and is the type of scent that transitions well from daytime to nighttime because it holds on the body longer. There’s no subtlety to this fragrance.  You put it on, you’re leather and pine all day and night long.”

The Bottom Line
It’s gonna cost you a several pretty pennies to smell good.  And because buying a bottle of cologne is really a pricey investment, the best way to buy is to get a few free small testers from the fragrance shop and put a spritz on your wrist or neck, walk around, see what you think before you commit $60 or $70.  And if you like a few fragrances and have the budget, get a couple.  Mix them up, just don’t mix them together.  But you knew that.  I hope.